24 December 2010

love-hate

LOVES:
1. That the left side neighbors are using the bells again. Hopefully it lasts until after Christmas.
2. The SC bag by Louis Vuitton in Jasper - because it doesn't scream
3. The irony of the censorship system being used on the Hurricane video of 30 Seconds to Mars; violence can only be shown after 7PM, sex after 9PM and anything bondage-y, after 10PM. (Actual letter) Since when did violence become the lesser evil?

HATES:
1. That RockMelt keeps reverting to google.com.ph
2. The thought of January and a Carine Roitfeld-less French Vogue (NY Times)
3. The name - Heel Condoms; The idea is inspired but I keep flashing to a NY alley and snagged on my stilettos.

08 December 2010

thought

There was a crimson underwing moth flying around the house yesterday.  It kept flying at me which totally freaked me out.  I can do insects as long as they don't fly at me.  I believe that moths carry the souls of the dead which is why I avoid killing them.  I really didn't want to kill this particular one because of my ink.  This is more than coincidence.  Call me crazy (and you wouldn't be the first) but I think this means something.  I looked it up and the Catocala are commonly found in Eurasia and North America.  There are some species in Thailand and Borneo but rarely in Manila.

Symbolic meanings for the moth ranges from dreams, perception, intuition, awareness, adjustment to concealment and protection.

Can I ask the universe to not be so cryptic?  My track record is a little spotty when it comes to reading the signs.  Like I said, my crystal ball has been very fuzzy of late.

16 November 2010

choosing

Grey's Anatomy Season 6 Episode 11 - I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked

Cristina asked Meredith; "If you had to choose between the thing you love to do and the person you love, which would you choose?"

Case summary: An opera singer is admitted complaining of bronchitis.  Diagnosis: Pleural Mesothelioma (Cancer of the membrane lining the lungs and chest cavity)  Possible courses of action: Removal of affected pleura and/or pneumonectomy plus chemotherapy and radiation.

Patient's reply: "I sing, it's my entire life...I’m big.  Too big.  I don’t fit in airplane seats.  And, as Jeff is always telling me, my feelings don’t always fit the situation.  If my food is overcooked in a restaurant, I get enraged.  I want to kill the waiter.  But I don’t.  I politely ask him to take my meal back and bring it to me the way I asked for it.  I spend my days making myself smaller.  Acceptable.  And that’s okay.  Because at night, when I go onstage, I get to experience the world the way I feel it.  With indescribable rage.  And unbearable sadness.  And huge passion.  At night, onstage, I get to kill the waiter and dance on his grave.  And if I can’t do that, if all I have left is a life of making myself smaller, then I don’t want to live.”

The whole "Be Yourself" schtick has been peddled from here to Timbuktu in a gazillion books and movies.  They can present it in a dozen, different ways or in a hundred, different languages but I think that opera singer said it best.  The world tells you to be true to who you really are but what if your real SELF is not something the world finds "nice" or deems "acceptable" by the normal, social parameters?  Why does the world tell you to "Be Yourself"; but if that self does not fit into the mold, the world will try to break you and if you resist long enough, it rejects you like a broken cookie.

To the world: Stop contradicting yourself.  Stop forcing me into the mold.  Stop making me choose.  Stop insisting I make myself small.

08 November 2010

06 November 2010

irony

It's a day where you are celebrated, supposedly.  Usually there's a party, gifts and well wishes.  The nightmare has experienced all three but has never found an instance in all 34 instances where this day lived up to what it's supposed to be.  It has always fallen flat or been one of the worst days of the year.  Sometimes it's my fault, sometimes, not.  Maybe it's an expectation thing again because we can't remember when was the last time we actually looked forward to this day.  We don't know why it has never been a GREAT day.  All we know it's always been bad or ok.  We've settled for ok.  In fact, with the past five years, we hoped and prayed for ok so much that we try to figuratively hide under a rock.  Think going into the shelter until the storm passes.  

It's just another day, it's just another day, it's just another day... 

02 November 2010

nightmare trivia

1. I can survive being marooned on an island alone...as long as I have a never-ending supply of books and dvds plus a high speed Internet connection.  
2. I eat VEERRY slow...and I hate being rushed.
3. I lose weight during Christmas...and I don't exercise.
4. I go into lizard mode if left too long under the sun.
5. I am usually late because I hate waiting.
6. There are VERY few people that I consider to be REAL friends...
7. Even if I am now awake during the day, my brain still works best at night.
8. I used to be left-brained...
9. Never been in a relationship.
10. Crowds make me cranky.
11. Self-proclaimed snob.
12. At the last count, 90% of my guy friends are gay...
13. My body always wakes up 30 minutes to an hour before my brain does...
14. Sarcasm is the best answer to stupidity.
15. I made the decision to stop needing, wanting and trying for others' approval during my first year in college.
16. Dessert, soup, then the salad are my favorite courses in most meals.
17. I have been keeping a yearly journal of my doings since high school.
18. My brain recognizes only two states; black and white...most of the time.  
19. Equivocation is something that comes naturally.
20. I realized a couple of years ago that I am not one of those who can work in a job that they don't really like in order to have the money to do what they really want.
21. I do not make plans nor set goals for the future.
22. Trying everything once is necessary as long as one remembers that addiction is a luxury.
23. Given a choice, I'd rather take a boat over a plane.
24. I can taste smells.
25. I compartmentalize...
26. If you're going to do something bad, don't get caught.  If you get caught, man up.
27. I am allergic to the color pink.
28. Over analyzing is a hobby.
29. Organizing is a form of relaxation.
30. Living near water is a must
31. I always prefer the book over the movie.
32. I am very good at arguing the black and grey sides.
33.

29 October 2010

stuck

I've gone through 95% of the books I got in the past 6 months or so and for some reason, I can't tell you about them.  I keep opening the drafts, editing a bit, then I end up staring at the blinking cursor for the rest of the day.  Maybe it's because my typing skills can't keep up with my thought process or probably that I'm trying too hard to be as erudite as possible without coming off as a know-it-all ass.  The contradiction that generally rules my writing isn't helped one bit by procrastination.

28 October 2010

27

The following questionnaire is based on research and experiences of socialised psychopaths.  For each trait, decide if it applies to the person you suspect may be a socialised psychopath, fully (2 points), partially (1 point) or not at all (0 points).

Do they have problems sustaining stable relationships, personally and in business?

Do they frequently manipulate others to achieve selfish goals, with no consideration of the effects on those manipulated?

Are they cavalier about the truth, and capable of telling lies to your face? 

Do they have an air of self-importance, regardless of their true standing in society? 

Have they no apparent sense of remorse, shame or guilt? 

Is their charm superficial, and capable of being switched on to suit immediate ends? 

Are they easily bored and demand constant stimulation? 

Are their displays of human emotion unconvincing? 

Do they enjoy taking risks, and acting on reckless impulse? 

Are they quick to blame others for their mistakes? 

As teenagers, did they resent authority, play truant and/or steal? 

Do they have no qualms about sponging off others? 

Are they quick to lose their temper? 

Are they sexually promiscuous? 

Do they have a belligerent, bullying manner? 

Are they unrealistic about their long-term aims? 

Do they lack any ability to empathise with others? 

Would you regard them as essentially irresponsible?

A score of 25 or above suggests strong psychopathic tendencies.  This does not mean the person is a potential mass-murderer: socialised psychopaths are not mad, nor do they have to resort to violence.  Even so, a close professional or emotional relationship with a socialised psychopath is likely to prove a damaging experience.


From: http://www.cix.co.uk/~klockstone/teleg.htm

27 October 2010

@sonielle

Kim turned 30 this year and to celebrate, she threw a themed party at Astoria.  The theme gave this nightmare a headache for two weeks preceding the event.  Legally Blonde, come in your best pink or purple outfits.  I have exactly ONE pink shirt in my closet.  In case you haven't noticed, I am not a pink type of nightmare.  In fact, I am allergic to pink.  It's probably psychosomatic but I can prove it by the appearance of rashes.

I digress.  Kim's 30th birthday.  I ended up in black and polka dots.  The pink part was covered by the pearls.  Dressing up once in a while is fun but if I had to stress out about what to wear every day or even every week, I'd go bonkers.


image from Kim

20 October 2010

mama mary

October is the month of the Holy Rosary.  Being the good, Catholic girl that is this nightmare, it had completely slipped my mind until last Thursday.  My dad mentioned that he would be doing a photo shoot of the Virgin Mary since he noticed an exhibit of Marian statues in HP.  I guess something "struck" him so he decided to go back the next day with his camera and studio lights.

Since this nightmare's schedule is busier than a bee during spring, she decided to spend the afternoon playing photographer's assistant.  Rather, the-ac-is-off-so-I-will-complain-a-lot-then-disappear-into-the-bookstore type of assistant.

I remember a conversation this nightmare had with Jam Mayer where we realized we couldn't not be Catholic because of our relationship with the Virgin Mary.  We give her almost as much headaches as we give to God.

In Catholicism, there are probably as many Marys as there are saints.  She unstintingly prays for everyone and everything with no conditions.  She comes in all shapes, sizes and colors.  This exhibit had around 50 statues that were all on loan from individuals and families; showing a very good range of the different Marys.  Now I remember why Barbie sometimes reminded me of Mary.


My favorites 






The Marys that are a little different from what I grew up with









All images by Edwin Celestino

19 October 2010

16 October 2010

cough cough hint hint

1. Wuthering Heights (Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition) - No complaints if I get the entire set

image from we'll always have books

2.  Starbucks stainless steel water bottle with straw

image from starbucks.com

3. Whole roasted almonds

Almonds Whole Natural 2lb (32 Ounces)
image from amazon.com
4. Proenza Schouler PS1
image from purseblog.com

5.  Bialletti Moka Express Stovetop Espresso Maker

Bialetti Moka Express Stovetop Espresso Makers
image from amazon.com

6.  Moleskine 2011 12 month weekly notebook/planner - LARGE - THANK YOU PEACHES!

Moleskine 2011 12 Month Weekly Notebook: Black Soft Cover Large (Moleskine Srl)
image from amazon.com

7.  Nokia E63 or E52 or E71 or E72

Nokia E63-2 Unlocked Phone with 2 MP Camera, 3G, Wi-Fi, Media Player, and MicroSD Slot--U.S. Version with Warranty (Ruby Red) Nokia E52 Metal Aluminium Business SmartPhone Unlocked Import--International Version with NoU.S. Warranty (Grey) Nokia E71 Unlocked Phone with 3.2 MP Camera, 3G, Media Player, GPS and Free Voice Navigation, Wi-Fi, and MicroSD Slot--U.S. Version with Warranty (Gray) Nokia E72 Unlocked Phone with GPS and Free Voice Navigation -- U.S. Version with Full Warranty (Zodium Black)
images from amazon.com

8. Gimble

Book Holder #8900 Gimble
image from national bookstore.com


9. Wizard of Oz shoes or Mary Janes - Miu Miu Glitter Loafer Pump or Patent Mary Jane Platform Loafers
image from talkshoes.com

10. Canon Powershot G10

image from dpreview.com


11. Smashbox Cream Eyeliner Palette - PROOF
CREAM EYE LINER PALETTE
image from smashbox.com

12. Bookmarks




14 October 2010

diet

The nightmare has imposed a nightmare diet on the world.  Translated: I am preoccupied with looking for pictures of shoes to bring to my cobbler.  All energies have been diverted to this task until further notice.  

10 October 2010

jung

I NEED this book.  Note, in my world, "need" has the same definition as "want".

09 October 2010

my dream spring 2011 closet

Favorites from New York, Milan and Paris Fashion Week.  Translated I would buy the entire outfit...See you again in February.  Apologies for the weirdness in the layout.  The HTML code refuses to cooperate.


(All images from vogue.com & style.com)

Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Chanel
Vogue Gallery
Isabel Marant
Vogue Gallery
Isabel Marant
Vogue Gallery
Isabel Marant
Vogue Gallery
Isabel Marant
Vogue Gallery
Givenchy
Vogue Gallery
Givenchy
Vogue Gallery
Balmain
Vogue Gallery
Balmain
Vogue Gallery
Bottega Veneta
Vogue Gallery
Bottega Veneta
Vogue Gallery
Burberry
Vogue Gallery
Dolce & Gabbana
Vogue Gallery
Dolce & Gabbana
Vogue Gallery
Dolce & Gabbana
Vogue Gallery
Dolce & Gabbana
Vogue Gallery
Dries Van Noten
Vogue Gallery
Dries Van Noten
Vogue Gallery
Dries Van Noten
Vogue Gallery
Emilio Pucci
Vogue Gallery
Gucci
Vogue Gallery
Lanvin
Vogue Gallery
Lanvin
Vogue Gallery
Lanvin
Vogue Gallery
Lanvin
Vogue Gallery
Paul Smith
Vogue Gallery
Paul Smith
Vogue Gallery
Paul Smith
Vogue Gallery
Paul Smith
Vogue Gallery
Prada
Vogue Gallery
Proenza Schouler
Vogue Gallery
Proenza Schouler
Vogue Gallery
Ralph Lauren
Vogue Gallery
Ralph Lauren
Vogue Gallery
Ralph Lauren
Vogue Gallery
Rodarte
Vogue Gallery
Rodarte
Vogue Gallery
John Galliano
Vogue Gallery
The Row
Vogue Gallery
The Row
Vogue Gallery
Yves Saint Laurent
Vogue Gallery
Yves Saint Laurent
Vogue Gallery
Giambattista Valli
Vogue Gallery
Giambattista Valli
Vogue Gallery
Giambattista Valli
Vogue Gallery
Commes Des Garcon
Vogue Gallery
Commes Des Garcon
Vogue Gallery
Celine
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes
Vogue Gallery
Hermes



Temperley London Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Temperley London
Vogue Gallery
Celine
Temperley London Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Temperley London
Temperley London Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Temperley London
Twenty8Twelve Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Twenty8Twelve
Twenty8Twelve Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Twenty8Twelve
Twenty8Twelve Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Twenty8Twelve
Dsquared² Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
DSquared2
Dsquared² Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
DSquared2
Dsquared² Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
DSquared2
Dsquared² Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
DSquared2
Viktor & Rolf Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Viktor & Rolf
Viktor & Rolf Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Viktor & Rolf
Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen
Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen
Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen
Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen

Vogue Gallery
Balenciaga


Alexander McQueen Spring 2011 Ready-to-Wear
Alexander McQueen
Vogue Gallery
Balenciaga